Tuesday, July 30, 2013

The things in your head...




OK, It's been a good long time and that's on me. Spring break I put on a few pounds but I got those off only to start gaining weight at about a pound a week. Wait! What is going on? How can a person that works out 4 days a week and eats good be gaining that fast?

The first thing I did was freak out, have a good cry and whine to my husband. Just the normal stuff. Then I made a Doctor appointment. That turned out to be one of the best things I have done. Some blood work later and I found out I had an underactive thyroid and high blood sugar. There was no way I was going to lose weight no matter how hard I worked at it.

Some prescriptions and a week later, I was feeling great. I had no idea how bad I had felt because it sneaks up on you. Now I have gotten back a ton of energy and feel like a new person. I have to be really careful what I eat because if my blood sugar goes up I feel like crap for a few days but things are getting better.

So I'm back on track and hitting the weights hard again. But I still have body image issues that make no logical sense.It's like chasing the rabbit down the hole. No matter how you look to everyone else, in your mind, you never look good enough. That next 5 pounds is going to make all the difference. But when you get there it's not enough. My mirror is the fun house one.Face it, I'm short and have a small torso. I'm never going to look like a model or have a waist. My ribs stop about 2 inches above my hip bones so where would that waist be? Either I have a few ribs removed or start facing reality. Reality seems a lot cheaper and less painful. 




I started taking an online class to deal with my issues with food and body image. It's only been a week but I can see progress. To start with, I try telling myself every day that I look darn good for an almost 46 year old women with two kids. It's more important that I eat clean for my health than my weight. I'm trying to move my focus away from that extra fat on my stomach to the fact that I can pick up over 200lbs. Be happy with the fact my husband thinks I look sexy doing an overhead press. I should be proud that my daughter tells all her friends that her mom is a power lifter at the coolest gym around.

Lots of people have these issues, even men. We have to deal with them or it becomes the monster that eats your life. Is everyone telling you that you look great but inside you don't believe them? Then you probably have the same problem. Start listening to them. They might be telling you the truth.

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